My Letter to Cisgender Heterosexual Women
Apparently you are expected and required to eventually get married
How else will you know love? DUH
You are also promised that a cisgender heterosexual man can only, and eventually will, prove his love by marrying you. Well, first, he has to be the one to bring up the topic and then eventually do a random surprise proposal…fun stuff.
But, first, you are told millions of times by “experts” how to be a “good woman” and to be “worthy” of finding a “good man”
These “experts” don’t mention the fact that not every person who aspires to get married will get married.
Oh…that will somehow be depicted as you eternally needing to become a “good woman”
Encouraged to attend Women Events and buy Women Books. Watch certain plays and movies. Most of this stuff is created and led by men.
Then people act shocked and baffled that women become desperate and struggle with anxiety and depression. Some women lower their standards and marry whatever man they find.
Add pronatalism and human reproduction to the mix and there is even more gendered pressure.
Meanwhile, most cisgender heterosexual men are not experiencing this pressure. Love, romance and marriage are less often posted on their foreheads. They tend not to be preached to in every environment and all social institutions. They tend to be told to live life and the rest will happen however it happens.
Sisters, stop buying the hype if it doesn’t fit your personal identity and personal preferences. Breathe. Other people don’t define your “womanhood” and your “good”
Other people don’t set your timer and your timing.